One of the driving factors for why I never lost weight in my teenage years was video games. Because of all the hardships in my early life – video games were my form of escape. While games are not harmful per se, not having a focus in life can be a travesty. One thing led to another and eventually to…
My Gaming Craze
I remember spending so many hours per day playing on my Playstation 2 and Gamecube that I didn’t have much time for anything else.
It was like there was nothing else in my life. I got up, went to school, came home and gamed until night time. I don’t recall ever doing homework, other than for half an hour or so while waiting for the public bus to take me home.
The amount of time I spent playing games would have had me looking like a fitness model before I got out of high school, if I focused on fitness instead.
There were days where I would find time to spend 10 hours on video games during school days. It wasn’t unusual for me to go nearly twice that amount in summer time and weekends.
I wasted so many hours gaming that at one point in 2006, my dad convinced me to give him all of my games to take to work with him. He did this in hopes of getting me to be interested in something other than gaming.
I quickly found that a week without games was too much for me.
That’s when it dawn on me that I literally had no hobbies other than games and got bored very quickly.
All of my gaming days made me extremely lazy and apathetic. I spent so many hours living in a virtual world, that it became MY reality.
Nothing Came Close
I tried different things, but nothing came close to my enjoyment of being some hero who saves the world, or destroying hordes of demon spawn in another.
The reality was much too grim. I wasn’t a hero, I wasn’t some cool chick who can go from sweet to kickass in a heartbeat, letting her guns do the talking. The thought of reality being far from what I envisioned, depressed me so much that I cried to my dad to bring back my games.
He reluctantly agreed, but only if I would spend only 1 or 2 hours a day playing them. It was better than nothing, so I agreed.
In the end – I once again couldn’t control myself, so I vowed to change and got rid of them by breaking all of my games and burning the discs on our outdoor grill. I probably burned close to $5,000 worth of video games that day.
The problem was that even though I got rid of them, my heart was still used to having something virtual filled in.
Without Video Games I Felt Empty
You know, years later – I understood that it’s not the book or the game or the movie that is the problem. We ourselves are the problem. If we don’t change ourselves then nothing will change.
Suffice it to say, I ended up buying another game several months later called Final Fantasy XII, lol. The madness continued. When college began – I was not mentally prepared and ended up dropping out after 2nd semester. I kept skipping classes to play computer games at the campus Mac Lab.
Such is the folly of mankind sometimes.
It wouldn’t be until several years later that I stopped playing so many games. After moving countries the games became less and less accessible. I was in a country where it was almost a privilege to even own a semi decent computer, let alone a tv with a console.
They did have some Chinese knockoffs, but those weren’t quite the same.
Now I have the ability to play almost any game I desire, but I choose to focus on “leveling up” my blogging skills instead.
This is so much more meaningful. I hope that someday I get to the point where I can help people overcome their weaknesses and live as freely as I do now.